White Meat Diet

Alec, ranting: Every day, I eat the same ta pao¹ local food as everyone else in the office, or I walk out to somewhere like Lau Pa Sat and eat whatever takes my fancy there. But then there’s ONE day, where I just HAPPEN to be eating McDonald’s in the office pantry, and everyone who comes in says “Oh, you don’t like local food?”

Me: But I thought you talk quite a lot about local food with them?

Alec: I do! But it’s like they refuse to believe! We went for a buffet and I didn’t eat wasabi with my sashimi and everyone’s first remark was “Oh, you can’t take spicy food?” GRAAARGH!

Me: Well, why don’t you explain that your girlfriend is local and you eat everything she eats?

Alec: Oh, that’ll be no use. They probably think you’re some SPG anyway.

Me: Haha, they’ll be all like “Oh, you eat cock?”

¹ Takeaway


  1. I don’t get it. All Singaporean girls are SPGs right? Why would they need to ‘think’ that Michelle’s one? Shouldn’t they already know for a fact?

  2. Oh Christ!
    Erm James, be a good brother and remove this website from the bookmarks on Dad’s laptop. Immediatly please.

  3. This website was EVER on the bookmarks on your DAD’s laptop? WTF??!!!


    I don’t want such a charming man (*smiles dreamily*) to think I’m a bad girl!

  4. Hey, it cuts both ways – at my new job, people were shocked that I ate pre-shelled edamame pea-thingies with a spoon.

    Am most jealous, by the way – the traders have a video conference with Singapore every morning, and one of the traders has an amazing looking bowl of laksa going cold in front of him. Just so unfair.

  5. Whoops, I really shouldn’t have left this window open when I was using his laptop. Oh well, live and learn.

  6. Benny: No lah, SPGs want a white man who is rich, cool and buff. I want Alec.

    Tamara: No need spoon what! I’m scratching my head at that too. Hmm, I think the last time I ate laksa was about 10 years ago. And I live in Katong!

  7. ….”Branded SPGs (Sarong Party Girls) because of their conspicuous lack of attire and aggressive approach to white men.” The Sunday Times

    Sigh, well I can certainly identify with the latter part of this definition.

  8. But my aggressive approach is to everybody, not just white men. I’m very fair-minded that way.

  9. Ignore previous post. I just read “All The Mich News That’s Fit To Print” and found out you did LLB in UCL. You remind me of a friend by the same name who did LLB in Notts. So pls ignore. ;)

  10. As someone who lives by almost all the SPG values that don’t involve regurgitation in order to be thin, or hair straighteners in any fashion, I object to that definition!

  11. Well of course you wouldn’t need hair straighteners, you have straight hair!

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