Say What?

Two snippets of Singapore from today.

#1: I Donno Where Is This Democracy

Me, getting into taxi: Hello, Parliament House please.
Taxi driver: Where?
Me: Parliament. Parliament House.
Taxi driver: Near where?
Me, perturbed: City Hall.
Taxi driver: Oh, so take ECP¹ then Rochor Road?
Me: Yes.
Taxi driver: After that you direct me hor. I donno where is this Parliament House.

* * *

#2: Racism 20% Off

Young friendly male sales assistant in a earring shop in Bugis Village: This one you like or not?
Me: Mmmm, not sure. Maybe something a bit longer.
Sales assistant: You dare to wear like ke ling kia or not?
Me: What?
Sales assistant, waving a long dangly earring: This one, like ke ling wear one.
Me, finally understanding what he was saying²: No, it’s okay. Thanks.

¹ An acronym for one of our expressways
² Ke ling is a derogatory word for Indian


  1. See also the special 20-foot high police watchtower in Little India, apparently the only place in the whole of singapore that requires such surveillance…

  2. Classic.

    Last night at dinner with my Godfather, this conversation took place.

    [no offence is intended by this extract, and I do realise that I’m 25% Indian, myself, on my dad’s side, ironically]

    La Trompette, Chiswick. Posh restaurant in suburbia

    Mum: … so I told both my girls never to marry an Indian man

    Anita, mum’s sister, and James, innocent fiance: Why not?

    Brandon and I: well, clearly, they’d beat them/us.

    Brandon: I always tell my Indian clients that when their wives are unhappy, it’s clearly because they aren’t being beaten enough…

    Tables around us: *silence*

  3. The thing is, that taxi driver is not the only one that does not know where Parliament House is! Chris had to direct the taxi driver there once!

    And about the ke ling earrings….. That’s absolutely hilarious! (I can’t stop laughing!)

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