And So It Goes

Via J-Walk, and The Huffington Post before that, this is apparently from Kurt Vonnegut:

Dearest Iraq:

Act like me. After 100 years of democracy, let your slaves go. After 150, let your women vote. At the start of democracy, ethnic cleansing is quite OK.

Love you madly!

Uncle Sam

Do you guys like Kurt Vonnegut? This quote makes me feel like rereading Slaughterhouse Five but I’m strangely worried that I won’t like it as much now as I did when I was 15.

26 Comments

  1. Hi, been following your blog for a while and I enjoyed reading it tremendously.

    However I find that nowadays you are just trying to impress upon readers how hip, cool and loved you are, and while I’m sure it’s all true, it’s also getting really boring.

    Where’s that spunky Michelle who honestly didn’t give a rat’s arse about what others thought?

  2. Hi, been following your blog-comments for a while and I’ve enjoyed reading them tremendously.

    However, I find that nowadays some of your readers are just trying to impress us all with how much cooler, hipper, and loved they are than you. Why else would they publicly try to lower you, except to raise themselves? Oh, wait, I guess that means they feel themselves to be unhip, uncool and unloved, or, perhaps, missing out on something in these three areas. At least you have fired up these insecure furnaces enough to give them the courage to express the feelings, the need, the damn care to comment . Because, after all, aside from this or that emotionally-boring sociopath, who devils around not giving a damn what other people think? Maybe the odd rat’s arse, but not me, which is why I like to read your blog. Keep the posts coming.

  3. Je Suis Saves: Damn, you’re good. I think you really hit the nail on the head with this sentence – “Because, after all, aside from this or that emotionally-boring sociopath, who devils around not giving a damn what other people think?” Thanks for stepping in, especially since we’re complete strangers to each other.

    Simon: Dude. Hell of a way to make your first comment here. One would have thought that you might have surfaced before, perhaps in those halcyon days where I wasn’t trying to impress readers with how hip, cool and loved I was, with something positive – but instead, here you are, lashing out like that at a complete stranger. Feel free to load this comments page on your screen and wank to it, if that’s what makes you feel good about yourself.

    Please point me to previous posts in this blog where I was indeed a spunky Michelle who honestly didn’t give a rat’s arse about what others thought. It’d certainly be news to me.

    Please also explain to me how my recent posts are “hip” or “cool”. As you have so perceptively pointed out, I crave affirmation of my coolness from all my readers, so it’s the least you could do, really.

    Oh, and I’m so, so, sorry about having the temerity to feel happy and loved, and actually mentioning that occasionally on my blog. Believe me, there’s plenty of bile I’d love to spew here, but it would generally be counter-productive and expose me to defamation liability. And that’s, like, totally not cool. Or hip.

  4. Wow, Michelle, such saeva indignatio! Hard to know whether posts such as the first one here are trolls or not, but whatever, keep on posting. Even though, as I think it was, Edmund said, I

  5. A three-dimensional Michelle? Does this mean Michelle is indeed, timeless? Cool!

  6. That would be a four-dimensional Michelle – though since no-one was talking about time, being three dimensional doesn’t preclude being timeless. If there were three of her, all with differing political views, and none of them ever changed, perhaps she could be five dimensional.

    Apologies, I studied Physics and old habits die hard.

  7. I want to be eighteen-dimensional! Also, can I please have one of those voices like a baddie Gobot where it’s like three or four evil voices are speaking at the same time? k thx bye.

  8. Oh, and I like your blog too. I mean, yes, sometimes you do come across as cool, but I’ve always assumed that was natural, rather than forced.

    And Stephen Hawking thinks 18 dimensional is too easy – he’s up to 23 at the moment.

  9. Oi don’t understan’ these dimensional musings of which you speak, mister.

  10. Only one way to settle this argument once and for all.

    “I’m hip, I’m cool”

    “Toka-toka-toka-toka”

  11. In lieu of 3 or 4 evil voices for my baddie Gobot voice, I will settle for 3 or 4 Stephen Hawking voices set at different pitches. k thx bye.

  12. I seriously hope Simon, that you are capable of a better first introduction than that. Cause you come accross as a bit of a prick.

    As long as I’ve been reading this site, its focued on Michelle’s attachments: music, reading, friends.

    The only people whom Michelle doesn’t give a rats arse about are people like you.

  13. Eighteen dimensions? I sometimes have problems enough coping with life in two…

  14. Michelle: believe it or not I had a bit a Google beforehand to check. I almost corrected one of your comments on a Street Fighter-esque shout (Shin-ruy-yuken? or something) a few weeks back and had to slap myself about for being anally retentive.

  15. Not that I was implying your anally retentive btw. It’s actually getting on my nerves now. I was pretty positive a couple of minutes ago that it was toka-toka. Now I am wracked with self doubt.

  16. I’m coming in to this a little late, but ‘Where’s that spunky Michelle who honestly didn’t give a rat’s arse about what others thought?’ is just too, too brilliant self-negating for me to ignore.

  17. Nicholas: Years of debating experience and I didn’t spot that. You is one smart cookie. Alternatively, I is one dumb cookie.

    Fellow Austin Powers nerds: I think it’s more of a “t” sound than a “d” sound. Which, quite amusingly, makes James’/Molloy’s (stick to something consistent dammit James!) attempt more accurate than I gave him credit for at the time, thereby wracking him with self-doubt. SORREE JAMES!

    Glenn: I feel wearing 3D glasses as one goes about one’s daily life contributes greatly to one’s feeling of coping. Admittedly, it may also decrease other people’s feeling of coping with their own daily lives, but that’s just the nature of the ratrace innit?

  18. Michelle: Innit indeed! Since your four years at UCL has evidently given you a feeling for some London vernacular, maybe this ang moh should learn some Singlish, lah? :)

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